No matter what people will tell you about me, I will adamantly claim that I'm a man of simple tastes. My friends, again, will quite as vigorously state that that man is speaking out of his ass, you shouldn't listen to him and "Hey, is that swine flu?".

I will therefore leave my friends in their own favorous positions. One where I can't hear them.

But it is fun having friends around, I'll admit that much. Nobody else will sit through listening to my incredible stories of adventure and Grand Plans for The Future like them. They will listen to them, but there is one combination of my general humility and GPTF that, once they realize I'm quite serious a bout it, has people hoping that I, " even though unlikely", will never amount to anything nor reach a social or monetary standing high enough to be able to fullfill my Grand Plan. And they're hoping this for not only my safety, but theirs as well.

And what might this plan be all about?

A Pink Tank.

See, most people strive towards fame and fortune because they want to see the world; they want a Lamborgini in their garage, a house in the Mediterranean, a trophy wife who, even on bad days, is as good of a ride as that Lambo downstairs.

Me, I want a Pink Tank.

" But why pink?", is the obvious question. And the most obvious reply is, of course, " Because it's a tank."

See, the thing with asking that question is that most people forget the obvious: I want a tank and I want it painted pink because nobody else has a tank! What that implies, is that nobody else has a say in the matter. It's a huge, 100 ton slab of irony - the proverbial walrus at the dinner table that only you seem to notice: if there's a big, tough-as-nails tank in front of you, the last thing you're going to comment is the fact that it's pink!

And boy, I want you to comment on the color! I want it bad - because the last thing my Pink Tank is going to be is deactivated. You might think my tank looks hilarious, but I know where you live, this thing has horsepower, and Oh-Sweet-Lawd would your house look nice with a few phosphorous or high explosive rounds racing through your foyer.

Because you can believe my Pink Tank isn't going to be firing rose petals, either - though I have been thinking about baby blue surface-to-air missiles to go with it.

Just in case somebody else does have a tank.

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Being a student representative in the most hyped student union/university merger in the country this year, I have to admit, it is nice to sit at the top and watch the little wittle bits and pieces fall together or not in a type of controlled chaos I haven't seen since that loaded up bus in China. And there are benefits...

... I just can't think of any right now.

Of course, most of the job's about ratifying semi-obscure paragraphs and articles justifying our continued existence as a student union - which is interesting in itself ( OK, who am I kidding?), but honestly, knowing there are people there solely for the CV-benefit of it ( I'm guessing 0?), I can think of quite a few better ways to make do of 6h sit-downs every few weeks.

But we are popular! At least the meetings, which are streamed live via Internetz to anyone who'd care, are viewed by scores of people! I kid you not: there are people those who will sit through the whole thing, at home, for fun!

I dug around a bit and found out why: it's the newest craze in - You might have guessed it - drinking games. People get shitfaced according to meeting doctrine ques, because we can't.

And that would be fine if people didn't send me messages during said meeting telling me to show... various things to the camera. Still, these people voted me in there in the first place...

Not that I have much political cred', anyway - at least not anymore, seeing as a semi high-flying mail was suddenly sent to one of my old ( I'm guessing junior high-era) e-mails. Which, to be honest, wasn't that bad. The proverbial twisting of the knife was the completely public, correcting e-mail stating that the sender couldn't find my e-mail but that... facebook stated that that would have been my proper adress.

The day I put up my work e-mail on facebook is the day I honestly believe I should be getting these mails to adresses like that.*

*No, I'm not stating the mail here, even if it's seen less action than Michael Jackon's real nether bits.

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There's a place I like to go every now and then to be completely by myself. The view from the rooftop of my apartment block is incredible at night, you can see all over the sea and almost to the other side of Helsinki from there. Absolutely beautiful during winter.

Haven't been up there for a while... but yesterday I sat up there all the way past midnight.

Maybe the coming of snow really has changed the pace of things...

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It's been really busy lately - so busy, in fact, that I've completely forgotten about writing anything! Alright, so my subconcious is shouting that I actually haven't had the time to write anything down, but I'd beg to differ.

Mostly been really busy with the autumn courses; with an intended 47 credits just this fall instead of the normal ( and arduous enough) 30 credits they expect us to push out, I've been mostly just been trying to multitask and schedule my studying more effectively.

So it tears up the social calendar, but what can ya do, huh? Strangely, I haven't been feeling the least bit stressed, but I expect that to change once mid-terms hit me in the face.

But damnit, I like studying! I haven't felt this think-thirsty in years, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna let that feeling slide!

....

Then again, today was the season's first snowfall. Quite a serene change to the whole dreary hail and autumn storms that've been going on lately.

Maybe it's time for a change of pace as well.

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Having taking my own sweet time recuperating from my short trip to Bremen ( OK, my Internet connection was offline for a week, go figure), it was refreshing to get back to the stuff I know best: schmoozing the High and Mighty and selling myself to the highest bidder - pretty much being an academic whore, if you will.

In the aftermath of the recession in construction last year (No, f**k you 'The Economist': Depression!) a whole lot of construction and infrastructure firms are trying to warm their ties to us, the would-be CEOs of anything with the word "build" in it, they've started throwing out meet-and-greets for us: a short presentation, food and drinks on the house, and usually some form of entertainment, usually in the Boardroom's private sauna facilities or some other - to quote McDonald's: "I'm lovin' it!"

Most people decide to go along with these out of pure interest, some for the free food and drink, a few because they like people vying for their future careers. Me? I go there vying for mine.

Let's be frank: we're not going to get better chances to mingle one-on-one with these CEOs later in life unless we're really crafty, smart or plain lucky, and wisened from last summer's less-than-optimal job market, I'd decided not to leave those meet-and-greets without at least one phone number, even if it was just the receptionist's! Networking is the word, ladies and gentlemen.

Today was my first meet-and-greet this autumn, with YIT none the less, one of the biggest contractors in Scandinavia. Long story short, asking business-related questions you already know the answers to, making some educated guesses and comments and chatting it up with the Senior VP of Baltic Affairs will quickly land you a few helpful phone numbers.

”Nothing certain, of course, but a determined applicant should be able to make good use of those people”.

Booyah bitches, we're back in business!

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My, it's been a busy few weeks!

Busy introducing the newest batch of freshmen to the school ( and quite a fetching batch they are), getting through the last summer exams just before the autumn courses hit me in the face like a shovel in the hands of a hillbilly and sinking deeper into the marshlands that is university politics - ”politics” being something I swore sometimes I'd never get involved in, but this job didn't seem like politics when they whipped me into it.

But most of all I've been enjoying the fact that I've gotten to see my fellow classmen again! It's fun to see the people you messed up your own freshmen year and admitting there's a chance that it might happen all over again!

It's been especially fun realizing how I'm stuck in the grinder once again; one week down and I'm knee deep in everything you need to screw with your head and mess up your spare time, not to mention your sleep.

... Which is exactly why I'll be heading off to Germany, next week for a few days, because nothing messes with your deadlines and lab reports like a good binge, right?

The again, I may actually be getting a bit old since I've actually garnered some interest in studying; partially because all of my freshmen seem to be able to party harder than me ( and with a median age difference of 3 years, I'm glad about that), but also because we're starting to get to the honestly interesting courses – not that many people get the chance to go on an ”Explosives 101”or ”Fire 'simulation'”-course, now do they?

And let's be honest: few people enjoy wanton destruction, huge explosions and pyromania as much as I do - something everyone should write in their blog at some point, just to keep the G-men on their toes!

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It's really silly that I haven't had any time to post anything for a while, but with summer coming to an end and the new semester starting on Monday, I've been busy like no other.

I mean, you shouldn't feel stressed during your vacation, but dangit, I guess i have been! I've mainly been busy studying to a few exams up this week and next week, preparing the upcoming tri-university merger as a member of the new-yet-not-really-existing student council, coaching and preparing this year's freshmen and some other personal projects as well. And on top of that, I've been desperately trying to find time to not only spruce up the walls in my apartment ( I've got all the materials ready, but no spare 20h shift) as well as finding an empty weekend to go visit the 'rents!

Hold up! First off, why the hell am I stressed over stuff like that, anyway? The exams, while compulsory at some point, aren't really that crucial to get through right now, so I'm just blowing hot air over that one. The whole student council-thingy, on the other hand, is so not me; people who know me will tell you that I don't do anything out of charity - but it looks good on the CV and I tend to end up in newspapers and the evening news every now and then because of it, so that's ... cool. Not that I really give a damn about politics, student or other, but damnit, if people want me elected and then actually do elect me, there's nothing really nothing to cry about, is it? No stress there, really, since I'm good as is, and it's not like I tried to get in there in the first place.

But the freshmen, uuuh! That's just a whole lotta fun coming my way, but it's gonna suck out a lot of time for a few weeks because of all the tutoring... and stuff.

But the two things that actually have been stressing me has been seeing the parents and getting this damn apartment done so I could finally, finally have a house-warming party ( just hit the 1-year mark for the place, by the way. YAY!)! But time, for the moment, is a luxury I simply don't have, and whenever I do, most of it goes to exercising or lying on the floor going *GASP!*.

Which is fine. And that tasklist is going to go down like crazy within the next two weeks, just swimmingly in time to clear out space for the autumn classes! WHEE!!!

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I know I've told most, if not all of you how I seriously think Life is out to fuck around with me every little chance it gets. Y'know, just to see how I'll react.

Do you know how unbelievably hard it is to shut off your alarm clock when you wake up when both your arms are asleep??? I tell ya, it would've been really funny if my alarm clock didn't make the most excruciating sound in the universe. I spent a good ten minutes trying to use the Force to make my arms move, but no dice.

I'm glad, though, that nobody was around to see me: lying flat on my stomach with nothing really moving except my legs and shoulders was a picture opportunity I'm glad the Universe missed...

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I am the dumbest motherf**ker alive.

Why?

It's midnight, the heat's stifling, and I open the balcony door... And my kitchen spotlight's on.

RESULT:

The Swarm.

And that's just a small part of the whole Brady Bunch.

Now look, I live by a "live and let live" kind of creed, but when Ali Bug-ba and his 5000 flies fly in through the door to celebrate the full moon, I go Final Solution like Hitler. You'd be surprised how quickly you can whip out the vacuum cleaner and a DIY-flame thrower when someone decides to make your nostrils into a breeding pen.

I'm down to 1000 already. Luckily, they're not that smart.

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I don't know about you guys, but over yonder, up here in Scandinavia, we have these little things flying around. They're like mosquitoes, but they're smaller! They don't bite, they don't really try to bother anyone either, they just fly around in swarms.

And I mean swarms. Actually, on second thought, they don't really fly around that much either; instead they just hang around in big-ass swarms just to be in the way in general. People on their bikes, out walking or out on a jog will be coughing these little fuckers ( hence called what I like to call them: hang-arounders) like tuberculosis. Run into one of those swarms by mistake - which is quite probable, since they're mostly transparent - with even a bit of a sweat and you'll be wiping the dying bodies off of you like nobody's business.

And that's not all! Like pollen during spring, these fuck- hang-arounders have decided to make my apartment ground zero, a virtual hang-arounder graveyard, if you will.

See, contrary to popular belief, it can actually get hot in Finland ( and I don't mean that in a relative matter), and because my apartment has the AC-equivalent of a fart in the middle of Sahara, I'm forced to keep, at the very least, the balcony door open. So every hang-arounder decides to come hangin' around in my crib instead, turning it into their crypt.

These fuckers die off like dodo's, people! No matter how much I try to clean the corpses off the floor, they just keep on coming and "going". You'd think this is just a cruel joke by natural selection; makes me feel like Jeffrey Dahmer walking around with a vacuum cleaner sucking up the dead. Y'know, you could make an artsy movie about that...

*sigh*

I just wish fall'd come a bit quicker, or that those hang-arounders would get a job, prefferably somewhere not-over-here.

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